It’s been a month...
Yet mom is too tired to notice she missed her period,
and dad surely doesn’t understand her mood swings.
I feel all this, and patiently wait they discover
I’m growing in her tummy.
It’s been two months...
I can sense mom's pulse quicken,
and feel dad's laughter when they were told they’ll birth me.
Then, I started feeling so hungry, making mom crave food 24/7.
It’s been three months...
I can feel the ache that mom endures,
the gentle pats on her back,
as they’re told I’m not growing normally.
But I kick her tummy to reassure her—I feel just fine.
It’s been four months...
Though my hormones make mom sick,
and the thought of me being “different” saddens her,
she always whispers to me how much she loves me.
Dad does his best to keep us happy.
It’s been five months...
I’m eager to hug mom and match a face
to the one who tells me she loves me so deeply.
So, I try to sneak out of her tummy;
each time I do, she feels differently—worried I’ll be too tiny to hold on.
It’s been six months...
I feel more tired now and kick less often.
My appetite fades; I find comfort in sleep.
It’s been seven months...
Mom’s pulse races more frequently…
I guess she visits that place where they rub cold gel on her tummy often.
It’s been eight months...
There are days I forget to live, feeling increasingly weary.
All I want is to hug mom.
It’s been nine months...
At last, I hug mom.
My tiny left ear rests against her unclothed chest;
I finally understand what mom calls love—as my heart resonates with hers.
It’s been months…
I think I’ll stop counting;
my heart no longer beats in sync with mom's.
Yet, in eternal rest, I found greater love.
PS:
I am/was a child with a congenital disease. My journey tamed by ambivalence, uncertainty… is the story I tell. On some days, I feel so tired I loss count of the days, weeks, or months spent with mom. Yet, I’m glad I felt/feel loved–yes, I do feel it
Let me whisper a secret😊:
I have/had friends who eagerly want(ed) to hug their moms. Yes, you can extend some love to us too via the AVIVA Week, which commemorates our journey. You donating goes a long way to adding miles and lines to the journey we tell
Mpacko Larissa'24
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